Bettering Her Neighbors' Lives

In Fairfield County, the picture’s painted for you: You’ll own a nice home, have a nice family, be healthy, be wealthy, be educated. These things give you a happy life. To others, yours is perfect.

But whether we admit it or not, we all experience periods of emotional turmoil, depression, sadness. Others have suffered through all sorts of trauma.

It’s not uncommon.

And for those people who might suffer more intensely from those afflictions, for those who need it, help is out there.

Weston resident Barbara Heffernan, LCSW, LADC, is a psychotherapist, holding her own practice in Norwalk. Her clients — primarily adults — come from all over Fairfield County.

“I treat people with anxiety, people with trauma issues, people who want to live happier lives,” she said. “I’ll help people work through current problems, help them recover from childhood wounds that are still affecting their present day functioning.”

Unlike psychiatrists, psychotherapists do not prescribe drugs. Rather, they aim to solve problems through cognitive behavioral therapy.

Heffernan did say, though, that in some cases where she thinks drugs might help change behavior for the better, she recommends clients talk with others who are able to prescribe drugs and have them use their professional opinion to determine whether that may be the right course.

Heffernan said she thinks “what exactly a mental illness is, is up to debate” and that “there’s a stigma attached” to those who seek therapy.

“I do think that shame frequently holds people back from seeking help that they need,” she said. “Having problems in our society is a taboo subject, particularly when you live in one of the nicest Fairfield County towns.”

Most psychotherapists probably don’t start out on Wall Street, but Heffernan did. After working in finance for more than a decade, she started to do a lot of soul searching.

“I knew [that career] wasn’t it,” she said. “I really began to look at the people around me and think about which people had jobs that I envied. I felt that a career counselor or a psychotherapist who deal directly with people to help create positive changes in their lives — that’s something I really wanted to do.”

Heffernan, who has an MBA from Columbia, went back to school and got a social work degree.

“When a person walks into my office … I look at them within the context of their family, society, where they grew up, the entire holistic picture,” she said. “That really fit more with my thinking, rather than a pure medical model.”

Heffernan said she works with people on a wide range of issues such as life transitions — perhaps a mother whose kids are going off to college and is feeling a sense of loss. She also helps people have suffered from very serious childhood abuse.

“Some of the issues are very difficult,” she said. “There’s some very intense situations. People ask my ‘how can you do that work.’ I tend to focus on the strengths of my clients, strength that allows them to live through what they lived through. Seeing that side of human nature — how you can go through such horrible things and still come out as a good, loving person, is really a wonderful thing. I love my job.”

“A large percent of the population” are affected by depression, anxiety or posttraumatic stress disorder.

“It’s unfortunate it’s such a taboo,” she said of seeking help.

When talking about mental illness, Heffernan said, it “doesn’t necessarily mean the person has quote unquote fallen apart.” Psychosis, she said, is “far on the scale” of mental illness.

“There’s a lot of mental health issues you would never notice — [that could affect] your neighbor, your teacher, your coworker,” she said.

Heffernan said she normally meets her clients once a week, but “sometimes people need more support than that” and they meet twice a week. “Once people have gotten to a point where they work through the issues, we might move to once a month.”

“Treatment is totally confidential,” she said. “Even to acknowledge a client was in my office, they’d have to sign a waiver.”

Heffernan said legally, she’s only required to report to police if she hears cases were a child or an elder is being neglected or abused, or if someone is homicidal or suicidal.

“If a grown woman is in a relationship with a man who’s hitting her, there’s no mandated reporting for anyone, unless the children are witnessed and involved,” she said.

Heffernan said that people who haven’t done therapy before or don’t come from a culture where it’s sort of a normal thing can do can feel a lot of trepidation.

“Once they get into a therapist’s office, they’ll feel much better,” she said. “Confidentiality is a protection, and most people will become comfortable with the process very quickly.”

For more information, visit Heffernan’s website.